"The way is long, and difficult the road..."

[the_gneech]

The gates of hell are open night and day;
Smooth the descent, and easy is the way:
But to return, and view the cheerful skies,
In this the task and mighty labor lies.

--Virgil, The Aeneid

I think about this whenever I'm going through my periodic funk-lifting. I get impatient with having to go through this stupid ritual of exerting my will over my emotions every few weeks, just as I imagine anybody who may be reading this journal gets impatient with hearing me go on about it. However, I don't just make these moods up, and I don't sit here bemoaning them just for the fun of it. I have better ways of getting attention if that was all I wanted.

My mental and emotional state is worlds above where it was just a few years ago, and I am pleased and happy with the progress I've made there. But in the words of Sleeping Beauty, "you can only live happily ever after on a day-to-day basis." Sometimes all it takes is a memory, an argument, or even just a late night to knock me down, and once I'm down, it's a lot easier to stay there than it is to get back up. But it's like building a muscle: each time I make the effort, it gets a little easier, and the returning to an even keel comes a little faster.

My first attempt to lift myself out of a funk took me two years, weekly counseling, and 900 mg daily of St. John's Wort extract; now it takes me two days and some upbeat dance music. I think that's a heck of an improvement! Hopefully, it will eventually reach the point where the time can be measured in minutes instead of days or even hours. It just takes practice, and perseverance.

The Morality of Mind

"This aspect is internal in nature and requires study in order to achieve the highest level of training in Shaolin. It is crucial that you be able to balance your emotional mind with your logical one. The emotional mind can supply you with the power and endurance to meet all challenges. Yet it is the logical or 'wise' mind that helps you make intelligent decisions and harness the fire supplied by your emotions. In order to maximize your training, understanding the morality of mind is key."

--Qi Elements Training Handbook

Y'know, I thought I was really clever when I made that realization; I remember mulling it over long in my mind. "Your emotions tell you what you value; your intellect figures out how to make it so." Now I sorta picture the world listening to me make that comment and responding with a hearty, "Well DUH!" Oh well. :) I was at least pleased that something I had worked out on my own, was a fundamental concept of the kung fu philosophy. That suggests that I am at least on the right track. :)

-The Gneech

Comments

[chipuni.livejournal.com]

To cheer up, try imitating this picture...



I'm sure that Laurie won't mind if you're dressed the same way. So long as you're at home, with her.

[the-gneech.livejournal.com]

Uh, aheh, well, there's a little-known but extremely strictly-enforced regulation of international law that specifically forbids me from dressing like that; supposedly it has something to do with preservation of the space-time continuum or some such, I'm a little vague on the details.

-The Gneech ("Ouch, those bayonets are SHARP...")