Your Gneech Report (Plus Some Artwork)

[the_gneech]

So, let us ramble upon a few things! First, let's get the artwork out of the way before I forget:

Luna's Knight vs. the Dragon by ~the-gneech on deviantART

My half of an art trade with seifer_a, of his OC pony @mlp_Alberio of the #TwitterPonies, undergoing his trial to become the first new knight of Princess Luna in 1,000 years. I really enjoyed this sequence.

And yes, I know the dragon is way too small to scale, consider it a sacrifice to composition. Luna would have had to be barely visible otherwise!

I couldn't actually remember which outfit Alberio was wearing at this point, so I just picked my favorite.

Midwest Furfest

MFF was cool and fun, but in some ways was more defined by who was absent than by who was present. The main reason I'd decided to go was to see kylet, since he pretty much isn't gonna come to AC anymore and I pretty much wasn't planning to go to FC. "In the middle" was the only way either of us were likely to see each other-- but then he got sick and didn't go. Le sigh! Also not present were graveyardgreg, tchall, or benbear, all of whom were once upon a time regular fixtures at MFF and all of whom I miss.

But I don't want to diss the people I did get to see there, notably invisiblewolf and Derrick, who I spent a great deal of time hanging out and having fun with, and mistahbojangles, who I sat next to in the Artist Alley. I also managed to bump into bauske, which was a rare treat. He's matured a bit since I saw him last (physically, anyway), he's looking good. :)

Unfortunately, there weren't any "homework parties" to speak of, as Brian and Cooner both buggered off to their hotel rooms to draw, instead of hanging out with the rest of us. This struck me as a pointless way to spend a con-- "You draw alone in your room all the damn time! Why spend a bunch of money to come to Chicago just to do that?" Oh well.

Still! It was fun and did get my creative juices moving a bit. I'll post art from it as I get the chance.

Thanksgiving and My Mum

Thanksgiving was quite nice; we invited hantamouse and jamesbarrett over to our place, figuring that with Sandy gone we'll have to make our own holidays. Unfortunately, there was also a bit of a specter hanging overhead, in the form of my mom's current condition.

Two weeks ago, my mom ended up calling paramedics in the middle of the night because her legs were not functioning; to use the cliché, she'd fallen and she couldn't get up. The next day, my sister took her to urgent care, who in turn checked her into the hospital. She had pneumonia, but had also suffered a minor stroke; during her stay in the hospital, an artery collapsed in her left arm, leaving it inoperative. On top of all this, she also picked up mersa. ¬.¬

She has since been moved to a rehab center in Shady Grove, in order to facilitate regular visits by my sister (who lives in Maryland), and Laurie and I have been going over to visit and/or assist with things as we can. My mom's arm is not numb and is currently experiencing spasms, which the doctors say is a hopeful sign that she will regain some use as the neural pathways re-route around the problem. But in the meantime, she's sorta stuck with nothing but daytime television to keep her company. We're looking at getting her a tablet (or possibly upgrading my iPad and giving her my older one) so she can watch her BBC shows on Netflix and such instead of being stuck with "Infestations" on Animal Planet. :P

Future Cons and Other Stuff

Right now it looks like Laurie and I will both be heading out to California around FC, at least for a few days, mostly to visit mammallamadevil more than actually for the con itself. I don't know how much time I'll have at FC and I won't be doing a table either way, but I hope to get some visiting with friends in.

Today I also need to send in my application for a table at AC. Normally I would have done that long before now, but as you can probably gather, things have been a bit stressed lately. :P A major reason I spent so much of this weekend working on art was because there's a very good chance I won't be able to do much of it in the upcoming months and wanted to grab the opportunity while I could.

On the other hand... I'm not depressed! I can't imagine trying to face all of this with that on top of it. But a few weeks ago, the depression I'd been fighting with since late last year just sort of broke like a fever and hasn't bothered me much since. The dysthymia is still there, of course-- it's sorta defined by the fact that it doesn't go away-- but it's back to being in its quieter and more manageable state. But hey, I'll take whatever blessings I can get!

-The Gneech

Comments

[aj-hyena.livejournal.com]

I see the word "stroke" and immediately think of something that keeps one's creativity and brain going: Minecraft.

[rigelkitty.livejournal.com]

It's weird, MFF this year was larger than the last FC, making it the second biggest furry con. Yet half the people I usually hang with weren't there, either. Who are all these people?

Dysthymia.

[praeriedog.livejournal.com]

      You made me go and look up "dysthymia". I'd never heard of it before. That sounds a lot like me before I moved to Florida. Except my moods were nearly always "sad" and "less sad". The less sad periods were rather dark and often filled with suicidal thoughts. I was able to fight through them, and could feel when they were coming. I set up safety measures to stop them with and triggered one after another until one of them worked. Sometimes I'd catch it early enough and the stuff I did first would work. Like standing with my hands against a wall and listening to fast music, or music with a beat to it on headphones and dance with my eyes closed without moving from that one spot and wear myself out physically until I collapsed on the floor in exhaustion. Sometimes I'd feel better after that, sometimes not. But the one that always worked, without fail, was going over to Hanta Mouse's and spending the night on the couch in his dark basement listening to David Lanz.

      I didn't know what was wrong with me. Just that sadness seemed to be the way life was, and I was pretty sure it wasn't supposed to be that way. So, finally I talked my parents into taking me up to Woodburn and getting therapy for it. My therapists never told me what was wrong with me, just helped through each week. I looked it up myself when I got to Florida. I bought my own copy of the DSM-IV and looked it up. Major Depressive Episode. Except my episode was ten years long.

      I didn't keep looking, because I'd found what I thought I was looking for. So I never found dysthymia. Interesting.

      A word of warning, if I may. Not long after I moved to Florida, I could feel my body changing inside. Not sure how to describe it. It's like I could actually feel the chemicals changing. I'd come home from work and spend hours after my parents had gone to bed, just sitting in the living room listening to music on the headphones and feel things happening inside. The depression went away. When it all stopped happening, I was actually happy inside. Maybe it was the sun I was getting a lot more of. I can't really say. But the depression disappeared completely. However, I've realized that the tendency towards depression is still in my body. Once, I got about three seconds from the razor blades in the bathroom, after getting myself completely drunk by drinking a whole bottle of wine so that I'd actually do it this time. It was only an e-mail from someone who made me realize what I was doing that woke me up and saved me. I realized then that it never really goes away. The tendency is still there, so if you don't watch it, the depression can come back. I'd stopped eating correctly and let the apartment go and it slowly crept back, affecting the other aspects of my life.

      Once I understood that fact, it had a much harder time coming back. I can tell ahead of time now, and can stop it. Just remember, it may seem gone and be gone. I'm rooting for you. But don't forget that the tendency will always be a part of your chemical makeup. Aside from a couple of short episodes in the last 20 years, I've been a happy non-depressed person. :)