From My "Forgotten English" Calendar

[the_gneech]

gulon
The gulon is a devouring and unprofitable creature, having sharper teeth than other creatures ... It has the face of a cat and the body and tail of a fox. It is black of color; its feet and nails are most sharp; its skin is rusty, the hair very sharp. The gulon feeds upon carcasses. When he has found a carcass, he eats so violently that his belly stands out like a bell. Then he seeks some narrow passage between two trees and there draws through his body, and by pressing it, he drives out the food he has eaten. And being so emptied, he returns ... and so continues eating and emptying till all be eaten ... This beast was not known to the ancients, but hath been since discovered in the northern parts of the world.
      --Edward Topsell's History of Four-Footed Beasts, 1607

Hmm. You'd think people would notice a thing like that running around the northern climes! I like the description "devouring and unprofitable creature." Sounds sorta like America Online.

-The Gneech