the_gneech: (Default)
[personal profile] the_gneech
Kids have it easy, in this respect: all they have to do is obey.

Granted, this isn't always easy in and of itself, but it's basically a binary decision: obey, or disobey. And assuming reasonably disciplined parents, it's a fairly easy choice, because to disobey brings punishment, while to obey brings rewards.

Adults, on the other hand, have nobody creating this easy binary choice for them. Almost every "non-crisis" decision adults have to make is made by weighing advantages and disadvantages, things gained vs. things lost, deciding if what they have to gain is worth what they have to give up.

I think this may be one of the reasons so many people look for strong authority figures -- why they want to invest so much power in government, why they flock to organized religion. Being an adult is hard work; people want to go back to the simplicity of being a child, and being told by somebody stronger than they are what they must do, and what they can't do. That takes the responsibility off of themselves. If the choice turns out to be wrong, well, it wasn't their choice, it was made by the social or cosmic Mommy/Daddy.

Oh well. Since I am pretty much damned if I do, and damned if I don't, I might as well just start picking some of the things I need to choose in my life at random. Ancient philosopher say, "Man who sit too long on fence, get a welt on his butt."

It would be easier if life were like writing ... that way, I could do a rough draft, then go back and revise once I saw how things turned out.

-The Gneech

Date: 2002-03-12 09:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] torakiyoshi.livejournal.com
I still say your moral code is deeper than you think, especially if you are having trouble with decisions like this. Perhaps if you sat down and pondered out your basic rules on the matter, it would be much easier for you to make decisions.

And just because I feel somewhat rebuttalistic, I'd like to say I did not "flock" to organized religion. Instead, I am the driving force which carried my family to church because I recognized the importance of having God in my life. He has rewarded me by making His direct Presence known to me on more than one occasion.

Besides, I ain't no sheep! Ich bin der I still say your moral code is deeper than you think, especially if you are having trouble with decisions like this. Perhaps if you sat down and pondered out your basic rules on the matter, it would be much easier for you to make decisions.

And just because I feel somewhat rebuttalistic, I'd like to say I did not "flock" to organized religion. Instead, I am the driving force which carried my family to church because I recognized the importance of having God in my life. He has rewarded me by making His direct Presence known to me on more than one occasion.

Besides, I ain't no sheep! Ich bin der Übermensch! :)

Children and adults...

Date: 2002-03-12 12:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chipuni.livejournal.com
Here's the catch... you can make decisions, try them out for a while, then learn what works and doesn't work for you, and change your decision. It's not as powerful as a complete rewrite -- you lose some time -- but you do get some chances.

Life is NOT a static THANG

Date: 2002-03-12 01:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mammallamadevil.livejournal.com
I grew up with two relatively progressive parents. I was always given the advantages and disadvantages and told to make my own choices even at a very young age. I was thinking about that driving over to eat carnitas with my dad this weekend (happy b-day bueno dude!)---he never said "just do as I say"...it was always, "well, you have a choice, either eat the brussel sprouts or go hungry. Here is why brussel sprouts are good for you and why I'm not eating them...(grin))...I have appreciated that because it helped me learn how to analyze my decisions, and weigh the pros and cons early in life. Not every decision I've made has been right. But, I've learned from them all, and except for a few, I'm not ashamed...it has, for the past 32 plus years, been a unique trip...

I like being an adult. I like being in control (however illusory some might argue) of most aspects of my life. There are days I enjoy it less than others, but I wouldn't trade it and be a kid again. I take responsibility for my own actions, and there lies the crux with many people. Religion, well, that is just another direction to me that is highly personal but not necessarily a responsibility issue (with some it is)

It is time for you to ass some structure in that tapestry that is your life. Some things, yes, you cannot go back and "erase" but almost everything is "fixable" to an extent.

MLD

Re: Life is NOT a static THANG

Date: 2002-03-12 02:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] torakiyoshi.livejournal.com
I agree with MLD here wholeheartedly. Kinda the same thing Chip is saying, too. Get informed, pick one, and since you're an adult, you can always go back and try the Brussels Sprouts. :)

And MLD, I LOOOVE that pic. Been wanting to say that for a while.

Re: Life is NOT a static THANG

Date: 2002-03-12 02:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mammallamadevil.livejournal.com
thanks for the compliment--taken a couple of years ago by a co-worker of mine---still have the glasses but they're chingered---gotta go get a new pair...

...ACK, didn't know I'd typed ASS instead of ADD...(grin)...MLD

Re: Life is NOT a static THANG

Date: 2002-03-12 05:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] torakiyoshi.livejournal.com
Ah yes, I was going to pick on you dor that, but I forgot. :)

Date: 2002-03-12 06:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] the-gneech.livejournal.com
I didn't say you did. I said "many people" did. You have obviously given thought to the subject; I was referring to those who don't -- of whom I've met many. -TG

Re: Children and adults...

Date: 2002-03-12 06:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] the-gneech.livejournal.com
Yes, but actions have consequences, many of which are not reversible. :) -TG

Re: Life is NOT a static THANG

Date: 2002-03-12 06:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] the-gneech.livejournal.com
I tried to ass some structure ... but I could find anyone who'd loan me their donkey.

(Wha-huh?)

Seriously, tho, I like being an adult, too -- but that doesn't make it any less work. :) And in my case, I purposely fast-forwarded over a lot of my formative years to get out of a barely-tolerable home life ... so I have spent the past few years going back and trying to develop late a lot of skills that most people naturally gain during their late adolescence and/or early adulthood. Growing pains are all the harder when they come a decade late. :) -TG

Re: Life is NOT a static THANG

Date: 2002-03-13 12:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] blacktigr.livejournal.com
I so totally know what you are talking about. Being the homemaker when you have no idea how to make the home is hard. There are other skills that I bet I will find I need more, but this set is taking so long for me to learn...

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