I must admit, I'm a bit down today. There is a lot of stuff happening all at once, and while I'm fortunate to be alive and have a home that's not under Lake New Orleans, I can't help but feel gloomy nonetheless.
Some of it is sadness about the aforementioned New Orleans. While I don't have any particular tie to the city myself, just the very fact that a major U.S. city is being abandoned, is something of a blow to a person. New Orleans is (was, perhaps someday will be again) a major cultural and historical center and is part of the national consciousness; a mind-bogglingly large number of people are losing everything they have. I keep thinking of historical buildings, of families losing childhood homes, and the sheer creepiness of a city of dead, flooded buildings.
On the topic of losing childhood homes, today is the last day of ensured existence for the house I grew up in. As of midnight tonight, my parents are permanently vacating 2525 Ogden Street, known to those who know me as "Ogdenland" (a term coined by my brother). I am going to stop by there on my way home tonight and give the place one last look ... by this time next year, the woods will be gone and there will be nothing but McMansions in its place.
Ogdenland was not a happy place for me, as a general rule, although it had its moments; but even so, it's been a major fixture in my life since before I was born, and its passage causes a kind of mourning. I wouldn't be surprised if I found myself hugging a few of the trees, just because most of my happy memories are centered around them.
Finally, there's just the stress and ambivalence I have about MFM. It seems really weird to be having a party, and in particular a party that's putatively in my honor, given the current state of things. BJ Buttons, who I was hoping to see, can't make it because he's going to be at his mother's funeral ... ouch. People keep telling me I'm going to be spoiled and generally pampered at this thing, which is never something I take well to in the first place, but now I'm even more bothered about it because there are so many other people who really need and deserve it a lot more than I do. But what am I supposed to do? Call up
tygercowboy and say, "How about we chuck the convention and send all the money to relief efforts instead?" Somehow I don't think the hotel or the airlines would be cooperative -- not to mention the fact that a largish segment of the furry fandom would be rather put out.
Frankly, I feel like a cad and a fraud, and I don't like the feeling. :( But I don't know what to do to rectify the situation.
Le sigh.
-The Gneech
PS: Oh, and as the delightful cherry on top of this stinkbug pie of a day, I encountered this in
indigoskynet's LJ: Whites 'find,' blacks 'loot.' WTF???
Some of it is sadness about the aforementioned New Orleans. While I don't have any particular tie to the city myself, just the very fact that a major U.S. city is being abandoned, is something of a blow to a person. New Orleans is (was, perhaps someday will be again) a major cultural and historical center and is part of the national consciousness; a mind-bogglingly large number of people are losing everything they have. I keep thinking of historical buildings, of families losing childhood homes, and the sheer creepiness of a city of dead, flooded buildings.
On the topic of losing childhood homes, today is the last day of ensured existence for the house I grew up in. As of midnight tonight, my parents are permanently vacating 2525 Ogden Street, known to those who know me as "Ogdenland" (a term coined by my brother). I am going to stop by there on my way home tonight and give the place one last look ... by this time next year, the woods will be gone and there will be nothing but McMansions in its place.
Ogdenland was not a happy place for me, as a general rule, although it had its moments; but even so, it's been a major fixture in my life since before I was born, and its passage causes a kind of mourning. I wouldn't be surprised if I found myself hugging a few of the trees, just because most of my happy memories are centered around them.
Finally, there's just the stress and ambivalence I have about MFM. It seems really weird to be having a party, and in particular a party that's putatively in my honor, given the current state of things. BJ Buttons, who I was hoping to see, can't make it because he's going to be at his mother's funeral ... ouch. People keep telling me I'm going to be spoiled and generally pampered at this thing, which is never something I take well to in the first place, but now I'm even more bothered about it because there are so many other people who really need and deserve it a lot more than I do. But what am I supposed to do? Call up
Frankly, I feel like a cad and a fraud, and I don't like the feeling. :( But I don't know what to do to rectify the situation.
Le sigh.
-The Gneech
PS: Oh, and as the delightful cherry on top of this stinkbug pie of a day, I encountered this in
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Date: 2005-08-31 02:42 pm (UTC)As for cancelling fun events due to something bad happening in the world...well, that's not how Britain got through the Blitz.
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Date: 2005-08-31 02:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-31 02:54 pm (UTC)Yes, I know it's strange to have the con under these circumstances. Look at it this way though - this is the only fun _some_ of us get in a year's time, and we intend to keep it. Come hell or high water, I want to see my friends and enjoy their company. Being reminded of how fleeting is life by the current events only makes me want to hold onto my friends and our rare get togethers all the tighter.
Celebrate while you can, for we know not what the future may bring.
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Date: 2005-08-31 02:56 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-31 03:18 pm (UTC)-TG
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Date: 2005-08-31 03:19 pm (UTC)-The Gneech
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Date: 2005-08-31 03:19 pm (UTC)-TG
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Date: 2005-08-31 03:21 pm (UTC)-TG
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Date: 2005-08-31 03:21 pm (UTC)Well-put, my friend, and, sadly, all too true.
See you (and John and the entire crew) soon!
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Date: 2005-08-31 03:28 pm (UTC)The simple fact that you feel like that proves you're not.
I'm sure any collections at MFM will raise significant funds for relief organisations, but as well as that I think that MFM is exactly the sort of thing lots of people need right now. Meeting friends and having some fun is exactly what people need right now. Under current circumstances there will be few people not feeling a at least a bit down. If you want to help then what better way than to make MFM a happy and fun experience for everyone there and help lift their spirits?
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Date: 2005-08-31 03:35 pm (UTC)I'm also working out a few other plans. I should be posting things early afternoon after things are finalized. Part of it will be helping those that are there to make things easier on them and also for us, getting back to the basics and showing what a good time still can be had no matter what and that we can help others feel a bit better or at least smile.
Hugs!
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Date: 2005-08-31 03:35 pm (UTC)And as others have said, we've got enough going on to be serious about. Morale-building does have an effect.
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Date: 2005-08-31 04:04 pm (UTC)Have the best
-=TK
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Date: 2005-08-31 04:16 pm (UTC)You know
Date: 2005-08-31 04:59 pm (UTC)If you didn't think like that... .Then I would be worried.
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Date: 2005-08-31 08:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-31 09:01 pm (UTC)See you in Memphis.
*hugs*