Fictionlet

[the_gneech]

Brigid put her enormous leather bag down on her desk and was just lowering herself slowly down into her chair when a perky voice said, "Hi, Brigid, good morning, hello!"

With enormous effort, Brigid swiveled her head around to see the new girl Tammy? Sandy? Mary? Jeanie! hovering at her cubicle entrance. Jeanie was just as eager and enthusiastic now as she'd been all day yesterday and especially at her "welcome buddy" lunch, for which Brigid had drawn duty. "Hi, Jeanie," Brigid croaked, then turned back to her computer and went through the heroic battle of willpower it took to push the damn button that turned the piece of crap on.

"You shoulda come with us last night!" said Jeanie. "A bunch of us all went over to El Guapo's for drinks after work. It was so much fun! Karen and Vivian kept hitting on the bartender, even though he was obviously totally gay, and I tried out this new drink they have that's kinda like a margarita, except it's made with wine coolers and shaved ice and stuff."

"Sounds great," said Brigid. "What do you need?"

"Huh? Oh nothing, I just came over to say hello. Did you see that scarf thing that Karen had? Well no, I guess you wouldn't, 'cause you weren't there, but Karen had this scarf thing that was so cute. I asked her how much it was and she was all, 'oh, I can't remember, I've had this forever,' but I was like, 'pssh, yeah right, come on Karen.'"

"Mmmph," said Brigid, using more effort than she had been hoping to expend on it.

"Vivian said that she saw a scarf just like it at Bloomie's for like $75, and I was all 'No way!' I mean yeah, it was cute, but it wasn't that cute, you know what I mean? Then she asked the bartender what he thought of it and he was all 'I think it's FABulous!' and then we knew he was gay. I mean, what kind of guy says a scarf is 'FABulous', especially like that? 'FABulous.' It was so hilarious, Karen turned about ten shades of red and we were all laughing so hard! Oh, and then there was this cute guy down at the other end of the bar. He was with a bunch of his pals, all losers of course, but Vivian decided to try to pry him away from them with a..."

What fresh new hell is this? Brigid groaned inwardly, and slid down into an inexorable faceplant on her keyboard.

-The Gneech

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Comments

[laurie-robey.livejournal.com]

What's this?!
Ah-ha!
I know you have been inconvenienced...

[kylet.livejournal.com]

I wonder how long it took before Jeanie noticed Brigid on the keyboard.

I vote for ten minutes.

[the-gneech.livejournal.com]

Geeze, just fall asleep in the middle of the conversation why don't you? What a bitch, mygawd!

-The Gneech

[hossblacksilver.livejournal.com]

Put me down for, she doesn't, finishes her monologue, then walks off without noticing that Brigid has (mentally) left the building.

[sirfox.livejournal.com]

I have worked with those. The male equivalent isn't much better, i have one in my company right now. They are a trial, especially for those nocturnal by nature, who don't become fully sentient until after lunch sometime.

[laurie-robey.livejournal.com]

I am a morning person, but I've known so many nocturnal people that I try to temper my enthusiasm until they're awake. All I ask in return is that the nocturnals forgive me when I fall asleep starting at 9 because I've been awake since 4.

[mg4h.livejournal.com]

Oh, god, I know people like this. I have had to faceplant THEM into walls to get them to stop chattering at me.

ACK!

*runs*

[excess-ego.livejournal.com]

So El Guapo's had a plethora of pinheads that night, sounds like.

[the-gneech.livejournal.com]

*looks around nervously*

Oh ... uh ... oh, si, it had a plethora.

-The Gneech

[exatron.livejournal.com]

Brigid should try thinking happy thoughts. Like, how much fun it would be to strangle that woman with one of the scarves she's babbling about.

[hossblacksilver.livejournal.com]

even though he was obviously totally gay
So, are there degrees of gay?

that's kinda like a margarita, except it's made with wine coolers and shaved ice
So, it's like something, only different, great descriptor there, Yogi Berra.

and stuff.
Yeah, I like stuff as well, almost as much as I like things.

that scarf thing
Yeah, it was comparable to a scarf, yet it obviously wasn't a scarf since if it was she would have simply said scarf. Instead it must be some sort of a scarf-like object and not an actual scarf.



Yeah, looks like someone's been forgetting to put chlorine into the gene pool again.

[genecatlow.livejournal.com]

Perky in the morning, just what Brigid needs.

Well, into each life a little 'guapo' must fall, dear heart. You've been a tad too snarky lately, a soupçon of agony should be just the Black and Decker beltsander touch to smooth out that rough patch.